I’m not sure how many times I declared “things will be different next year” before I finally began to focus on the essential things in my life and started to make changes that last.
This isn’t uncommon, in fact just the opposite. Most people plan on doing tomorrow what they really know they should be doing today.
I confess that I too can sometimes be guilty of this. Oh the horror! I’m a Marriage Therapist and I’m far from perfect.
But it’s not you, or me for that matter – it’s how we are wired. Our brains primary function is to keep us alive. As such, if we are drawing breath at the end of the day it thinks what it did was awesome, and (for the most part) wants to do the same again the following day.
It’s a bit like a recovering addict, it just wants to deal with one day at a time. Even though our neocortex, or mammalian brain, has cool features like planning for the future, it sits on top of the older parts of the brain that are more concerned with survival.
When you want to plan, your executive brain (the cortex) has to get the approval of the more short-sighted parts of your brain that are a lot more interested in avoiding pain and acquiring pleasure.
This can wreak the most havoc in married life.
Fortunately for me, I have a select group of colleagues, a couple of close guy friends, and a very patient, persistent and persuasive wife to keep me on track when I casually throw out ideas without always thinking them through. But not everybody has a coach or somebody to encourage and support them when they stray off their best path.
Next year I am going to do something I have never done before and that’s start a very exclusive mastermind group, just for men looking to master the art of being a husband. I was going to say improve their husbandry skills but apparently that term applies to farming, not marriage. Go figure.
I am looking for just 6 highly committed husbands who want to make some serious long lasting change through 2016.
Initially we will meet one time for everybody to explain their situation and what they are looking to achieve with the help of the group. Then all seven of us will meet once per month.
That means in total the group will meet 13 times, but every man will also have 2 one-on-one sessions with me throughout the year whenever is most suitable and beneficial.
15 sessions with me, without the help of others taken into account, would normally cost you about $1,800 – this won’t be close to that.
This opportunity will cost $109 per month, or if you pay in full by January 1st, a mere $899.
Why am I doing it so ridiculously cheap?
Well, I’m piloting it. I have never done something like this before and quite honestly it will be a load of fun for all of us – providing that is you are totally committed not just to your own success, but to help others too.
A few questions that may be circulating in your mind.
What if I don’t like it after 2 or 3 sessions?
If you have paid in full for the year to save over $400, then there will be no refunds. However, if you are paying monthly, then you can withdraw and your payments will end that month. Any one-on-one sessions with myself you may have taken would be invoiced at my normal rate if you withdraw inside 6 months.
All sessions will take part on Zoom and recorded in case you cannot make one.
Times we meet will be varied to help people who cannot make the same time each month, and will be determined once the make up of the group is discovered.
Throughout the time you will have group support, plus I’ll be around to provide any gentle, and even not so gentle, nudges (i.e. butt kickings) along the way.
This group will be on an application basis only.
I have no idea how many people will apply, and I want to have a phone consult with everyone to make sure I get the best and most committed husbands who genuinely want to make 2016 the launching pad for a completely amped up marriage and life.
Is this group for me (or my husband if you’re a wife reading this)?
It may be, if:
- You feel stuck, bored, or lost and want help to fulfill your potential
- You are a serial procrastinator and want to break the pattern of under achievement
- You are a perpetual Nice-Guy who has a frustrated, disconnected, and distracted wife
- You can’t remember when the last time your wife was “a freak in the sheets” (completely turned on, for those of you who are more reserved)
It’s not for you if:
- You’re not prepared to get involved and help the others
- You will lose interest half way through
- You just think it’s a bargain and worth throwing some money at in case it happens to get you laid
- You want every session to be about you and don’t really care if others in the group aren’t successful
This e-mail is going to 8,000 people plus my blog readers, but I have absolutely no idea how many people will be interested. However, I’d rather cancel it than take people who I believe may not be totally committed, which is why I am making it an application process and not just taking the first people who contact me.
Having said that, if you’re awesome and apply immediately then I will close this offer once we hit 6.
Give it some thought and if $109 per month or $899 for a year is a worthwhile investment in getting you up and running, then contact me and let’s begin the conversation!
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