We all know we need to date our spouses.
We all know we should be spending quality time together.
We all know we should get away from work, home, and kids and be alone together.
But sometimes getting out on that all-important date is hard.
With that in mind, here are 3 obvious but very important reasons to serve as a reminder of why dating in marriage is so important.
Fuel the Fire
Dating your spouse feeds the fires of romance.
Before we got married, my (future) wife and I spent every minute we possibly could together. When we weren’t working or sleeping, we were doing something together.
Usually this involved doing something active outdoors.
Then we got married and the routine set in. Then work got more serious and kids came along. Before we knew it, other things were filling up our time instead of each other.
Romance took a backseat to bills and chores.
By dating your spouse, on a consistent basis (weekly if possible) you fuel the fire that brought you together in the first place.
You’ll realize he or she really is your favorite person in the whole world. You realize there’s more to your relationship that than just being roommates, breadwinners, and babysitters.
Romance is not a temporary tool only meant to bring couples together. It should be a permanent fixture in the lives of every loving marriage.
Another obvious but often forgotten reason for dating in marriage is to grow closer.
Last week my wife and I went out on a snorkeling trip together. She was laughing as we zipped over the clear turquoise water to our destination.
I loved being able to share that with her. After a day of fun together, we came home feeling closer, and yes, more in love.
When you date your husband or wife, you get to have new experiences by doing and seeing new things. You get to know each other better because you’re seeing each other in a new light – sometimes literally!
Common activities lead to shared feelings. This increases the amount of shared memories you have together.
Think about it. What if all you did together was to ask each other to pick up the kids or pay the mortgage or mow the lawn?
By living together but not really “loving” together, there’s no way to grow closer. A strong marriage is built upon growing closer together.
Dating provides the perfect outlet to do just that.
It’s About Priorities
When all is said and done, what’s the single most important thing in your life? Why your spouse of course!
It makes sense then, that you’re filling your life with as much spouse-time as possible.
By dating your spouse, you’re telling him or her that he or she is a priority in your life.
Obviously there are things that take up our time – good things. Working on your career and making money, spending time with friends and family, and working with your school or church are all good things.
The difference here is that by making your spouse a priority, these things won’t ever become more important. They may take up more time. But they aren’t more important. There’s a difference.
While it may not be realistic to spend 40 hours a week dating, the time that you do spend together can be focused and potent.
By dating each other on a regular basis, your marriage will be strengthened. You’ll feel loved. You’ll have a solid base to go out into the world.