Communication and Blame, Part 2
Part two of my conversation with Denis Merkas of MELT, Couples Massage Courses. “We don’t fight about things… we fight about meanings of things” We’re talking about arguments and all things communication. This is an interesting topic – every couple fights. How do you...
The Language Of Sex, Part 1
I had the chance to have a conversation with Denis Merkas, the founder of MELT, Couples Massage Courses. He came all the way to Texas to get some answers for his audience - and for good BBQ. In this episode we discuss the Language of Sex. Communication is the...
Growing Up In Marriage
This past weekend I had the chance to speak at Freedom Church Los Alamos. It's so great to be among real people - who love God - and are bringing God's love to others! *Interested in having me come speak to your group or church? Let's start the conversation by...
Live Dangerously in Marriage
“Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure. Life is either a daring adventure or nothing.” ~ Helen Keller Creating intimacy between you and another person can be scary, even dangerous at times — but most everyone wants it; to not be alone as...
What If Your Story Changes?
"Hey babe, what if next summer we set off on an adventure as a family and travel around the country in an RV for a year or two?" "I could see doing that." A couple of hours later my wife comes to me … "There has to be a bigger reason to do this. Simply traveling the...
Too Busy?
Meet the All-American family: a house in the suburbs, nice cars, 2.5 kids, both parents working, kids on a team for soccer, baseball, dance, quite a bit of debt on credit cards, a mortgage, and routine, vanilla sex once a week (usually). Or put another way, schedules...
What If You're Wrong?
Do you have seasons or years of your life that you look back on and wonder "Who is that person?" I can't believe I used to do that, think that, work there. I used to try and not care about anything as a teenager and young adult - when the truth was I actually cared...
Let's Talk About Sex, Baby
Sex is an important aspect of most every marriage. Your sexuality plays a major role in life. It influences how you dress, act, and interact with others around you. It's everywhere. Stand in line at your local grocery store and see if you can avoid seeing the word sex...
Sexual Desire Differences, What If There's Nothing Going Wrong?
Are you the high desire or the low desire spouse when it comes to sex? Have desire differences created problems in your marriage? Sooner or later, most couples experience problems in this area. Desire problems are the most common sexual complaint for couples. But what...
The Paradox of Getting More Done
I used to be a lot like you. I had huge to-do lists, ran myself ragged, and worried endlessly how I was ever going to get everything accomplished because man, I was so busy! It almost was a badge of honor. I mean, it's how we answer everyone's casual greeting of "How...
Ultimatums in Married Life
When things happen in married life, whether bad or good, a common reaction is to blame (or give credit) someone else. While they may have been a contibuting factor to the result of a situation, when we fail to acknowledge our own role in life's circumstances, we...
Helping When Help Isn't Really Wanted
The scene is a couple driving in the car on the way to dinner: Silence for several minutes. “What’s wrong?” “Nothing.” A few more minutes of silence passed, "I know something is wrong. What’s going on?” “Nothing! Jeez, what am I doing?” “That’s just it! You’re not...