Think back to your first date.
I’m talking about the first date you had with what would become your spouse later on.
What was it like?
What did you do?
How did you feel?
In many cases, the first date is one of the best dates (or at least certainly the most memorable) for a couple. Sometimes the dates were traditional where the guy picked up the girl and did a dinner and a movie.
Other couples have stories of even more creative dates.
What was yours like?
Regardless of what happened or what you actually did on your first date, something worked because, well, you ended up getting married in the end!
Wouldn’t it be great to recreate the magic that you felt on that first date?
Well you can! You can do this by having a second first date. Here’s how…
To create your second first date, start by preparing yourself physically. Preparing physically includes recreating all of the tangible things of your first date. Naturally, you may not be able to recreate everything exactly as it was but try your best. As circumstances allow, do the following:
- Wear the same clothes – if possible, wear the same clothes you wore on your first date. Do you remember what clothes you wore? Do you still have them? If so, wear them! If it’s been a while or you don’t remember which clothes you wore (or you can’t fit into them), just try wearing something from the era of your date.
- “Bring the roses” – bringing the roses is a bit more figurative that literal. By all means, if you brought roses, do it again. But what I mean is bring anything that set this apart from your other dates. Maybe you had a special note or card. Maybe you even made a mix tape!
- Go to the same place – what did you do on your first date? Did you go bowling? To the opera? If you now live in a different place, try and do something similar in your current town.
- Eat the same food – there was probably some food somewhere on your first date. Go to the same restaurant or get the same take-out.
Mentally preparing for your date is actually more important than preparing physically for your date. It’s true that by wearing the same clothes, doing the same things, and so on will help you get into the mindset. But the mental preparation goes deeper than that.
Preparing mentally involves recalling and reliving all of the thoughts and feelings you had on your first date. This is especially helpful if you can’t recreate all of the details of your first date.
To mentally prepare, do the following:
- Actively think about your spouse – think about him or her as if you were going out for the first time. Try and recall the feelings of anticipation you had getting ready for your date.
- Be on your best behavior – just like your first date, try and show off your best self to your date. This involves good manners, chivalry, and just plain being cool.
- Watch your conversation – resist the temptation to talk about kids, mortgages, bills, and so forth. This is old married stuff talk. Instead, talk about your dreams and goals. You can also take this time to learn more about each other’s personal history. Ask all of the get-to-know-you questions that you would normally ask on a first date.
Recreating your first date can be a great way to stimulate the romantic feelings you share for each other and deepen your love. It’s also really fun!
One last thought – maybe you didn’t have a great first date. That’s OK because now there a at least two things you can do.
One, recreate the best date you did have with your future spouse.
Or two, this is a perfect opportunity to create your first date exactly as you want it!
What else can you do to make your second first date the greatest?